Posts Tagged ‘Relationships’


(Living Love) Two Things

Even when we are not consciously thinking about it, we are growing, changing and modifying our behavior based on experiences, consequences, and feedback (subtle or clear) that we get from those around us. We frequently see things in our spouse that we want them to change or to do more often. But when they do something that does make you feel loved, considered, or taken care of, do you take a moment to affirm or thank them?

Look back on the last week and find two things that your spouse did that made you feel loved or that was important to you. Maybe it was an unexpected hug, them filling up your car with gas or doing a simple chore for you, tucking the kids into bed so that you could have a break, or a compliment that they gave you. In a quiet way, just thank them for it and maybe add on a brief comment about how it impacted your day.

Most changes in people don’t happen overnight. Just as you want people to be patient with your gradual growth, do the same for your spouse. It is so easy to give negative feedback, but I challenge you this week to find two places to give them positive feedback.


(Living Love) Sweet Nothings

lindtVery few people in your life know that you get midnight cravings for peanut butter M&Ms, have a weakness for extra dark chocolate, or adore those powdered donuts packets from the gas station. But on those rare occasions when somebody has noted that sweet treat that you love and then surprised you with it, it means a lot. Not just because they gave you the coveted item, but because they made the effort to learn what it is that you love and went out of their way to surprise you with it.

What is a sugary treat that your spouse loves? Surprise him with it! Leave it on his pillow, in his briefcase, or in the box of cereal (…or not…you don’t want the kids to find it first). It is a simple way of turning a sweet treat into a sweet nothing.


(Living Love) Drive Time

Many of us begin our days with kissing our husband goodbye at the door as he leaves for work shouting a quick goodbye over the clamor of little voices while mopping spilled milk off the floor. And that’s okay.

Make arrangements one day this week, though, to send off your husband in a different way. Drive him to work yourself.

It might be earlier than you are typically ready to be out the door, but leave behind the makeup and let the kids stay in their pajamas. If time allows, you can even pick up some doughnuts or coffee on your way. This time just gives you a chance to truly begin your day together. It is a reminder that you are partners in life and when you share in the mundane tasks together, such as fighting morning rush hour traffic, life is better.

Plus, it can be empowering to start off your day with a reminder that you are loved.


(Living Love) Love Notes

Who would have ever thought that the love note could be so powerful? I mean really, it is usually one or two sentences scribbled on a Post-it note or a scrap of paper that was torn out of a notebook. Yet it still has the ability to make the heart flutter. It is a reminder that you are loved, desired, and worth pursuing.

So today, stick a little note on your spouse’s bathroom mirror, in their lunch bag, sock drawer, or car and just tell them that you love them.

And I will take the challenge a step further. Do one note every day this week. You can go ahead and write the notes in one 10 minute sitting and then place them around the house as you go about your week. This act is simple, yet powerful. Don’t underestimate the significance of a Post-it note.


(Date Ideas) Coffee and Cards

Grab a deck of cards or your favorite game and head to a local coffee shop. Spend a couple of easy hours at a bistro table sipping cappuccinos and playing round after round of Hearts or Phase 10. The easy recreation will keep the atmosphere light while the shared laughs and stories will facilitate a time of connecting.

*If you can’t get a babysitter that night and need to stay close to home, play outside on a patio table while sipping homemade drinks. A date-like atmosphere can easily be created by simply moving to outside of your normal routines.